my article from Titus 2 at The Well today
The Holidays, especially the time before Thanksgiving and Christmas can be really stressful and sometimes difficult for maintaining family life. There are lots of events, and added parties and family visits. There is the excitement in the air, and all that sugar! Yummy desserts at every turn.
We don’t even celebrate Christmas as a big event, in fact all we do is a big family meal but still you can feel it in the air. The parades, and sales, and family pictures and company coming over. While all that excitement can be fun, it can also be over exciting for some.
Children are wired differently, some go with the flow and some can barely cope. We recently had a couple of our children ride their horses in a parade in our small town and even though they ride in horse shows all the time it was something new. I didn’t realize until one of my other children mentioned it that my nearly 15 year old daughter was so over excited that she never ate all day. She couldn’t. She was just too wound up to even eat. You couldn’t tell on the outside, she was exercising great self control. It isn’t just the little ones that get over excited.
One of the best ways we can to help our families to enjoy fun family times is too keep to our regular schedules or routines as much as possible. Children need to know what comes next, little children and sometimes big children. Anxiety comes from being unprepared. If they know what to expect they can cope better. When they don’t cope well, they tend to irritate Momma.
Have you ever had a 6 or 7 year old ask the same question over and over on a hectic day? That child is feeling uneasiness. If you will take them aside and get them to quiet down and talk to them and find out what their concerns are, often you can solve the problem. Sometimes they will keep asking as a means of getting attention. Sometimes they just want a conversation with Momma and that is the only way they know how to start it.
Here are some tips for keeping peace and sanity before or between Holidays.
- post a family calendar in a public place in your house, like the refrigerator, have all events on it, use pictures if you have pre-readers
- make a to-do list for busy days, teach your children to cross off each item as it is accomplished
- always always start each day with prayer
- have some point in each day where everyone is present together for prayer, and family announcements and coinciding schedules
- plan events that are important and fits everyone’s schedules, do not overbook yourselves
- keep the sugar and packaged foods and junk to a minimum, except for preplanned indulgences
- did I remind you to pray?
- if you have pre-readers go over the daily schedule with them each morning, including the weather report
- if you are having a big meal at your house print out a menu
We sometimes forget that when we tell a child, “get ready we are going to Grandmas house” that they don’t always know what that means. Yes they can dress themselves but will it be a hot day or a cold day, will they be looking pretty or playing? When are they going, right after breakfast or later in the afternoon? Such questions can be very stressful to a little person. It helps to break it down for them. And oftentimes for big folks too?
The best way to cope with pre-holiday or post-holiday stress is to combat it with familiar routine. Back to basics. The traffic and chaos at the stores is bad enough, we don’t need it at home. And did I remind you to pray? 🙂
*This is an excerpt of an article in Penny Raine’s free E-zine for mothers called Front Porch Fellowship that is sent once monthly, you can subscribe for free at her bookstore.
Nessa says
Great post! The holidays can be so stressful, thanks for your great pointers.